As I recover in my medical recliner from my recent reconstruction. ( and man is this one rough!) I still can’t pull myself up, open door or really stand for too long before the pain stars in. So I am revising my Etsy store to keep me sane, nothing like fixing pictures and titles to get my mind moving! Here is my address to my store, check it out and let me know how you like it!
Well yes, it’s that time again we all love, preparing for surgery. Somehow I end up having one major surgery for each of the past five years! Now it finally time to fix up my girls! I’m now a pro at this by now!
It’s been a year and a half since my implants where put in. Things have settled and I’ve lost weight. My right side keeps contracting making my left side 3 sizes bigger. We are hoping with this revision it will help it not look so much bigger.
So this apparently is pretty painful… PLEASE! I’ve been down this road before I can handle it! They will be creating pockets on my chest wall and placing the implants in them to prevent them from being so moble. Let’s not forget I’m a large girl, my implants are 900cc, it take a village to hold my girls up lol. And let’s not forget the part we all love the most…the drains!! Yes for two weeks I will be battling these lovelys. Let the measuring begin!
So I’ve gone over my own list of ” mastectomy must haves”, knitting needle, dry shampoo, chair, good ol Poocharoo and of course the wonderful care from my husband rick. Everything seems to be set for 7:30am surgery tomorrow.
Just trying to relax today an not worry about the three house surgery. I know I will wake up a new person, just in a little more pain then when I went to sleep.
Another major thing happening is, our deposit is down for our gestational carrier!! Hopefully by the time my twins are healed, we could actually be expect another set of twins, babies!! Positive thoughts for both out comes! 😁
Well here I am approximately almost 4 years in remission, and I finally feel like I’m moving on with my life. My husband and I are starting to embark on a new journey of surrogacy. I still have more reconstruction to be done before the birth, but we are jumping on that mommy and daddy wagon right now. Some how in my body I’ve got a biological clock, and it’s ticking. Yes! Amazingly enough a part of my body that has not been remove! Lol
In between having my lumpectomy and my chemo treatment, I was smart enough to have my eggs harvested at age 36. I really feel that doctors nowadays need to inform younger women of their options about the fertility before going through treatment chemo. I only had a 8 week window to squeeze two cycles of IVF in. If I was informed sooner I might have done one before my lumpectomy and two after. I Was only able to harvest nine eggs which resulted in eight embryos. I had also found out during IVF I had polycystic ovarian syndrome, who the hell has this many diagnosis is in their life??? So it looked like Cancer or not,Ivf was in my future, but not necessarily a gestational carrier. Thanks Cancer for throwing that curve ball into the mix!
Now,I had mixed feelings about disclosing myself obtaining a gestational carrier for my embryo. Hopefully there are some people out there like me who can share their story. I was hesitant because a lot of people have made very nasty comments to me particularly about my age and having a baby. Or me being too ill ( I now have fibro and lupus,yay) Seriously??? Wtf?? At 40 I’m too old? Believe me I didn’t choose to get cancer at 36, nor would I wish this on anyone else. I think 40 is the new 30, and to all those who have nasty opinions… What’s the saying? Opinions are like A-holes everone has one?? Or I prefer the golden rule, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all! I beat cancer, I CAN raise a child. My son is already 15 yrs old and I did it while fighting cancer. That should tell you I am one strong woman.
And what about Juliana Ransik, anyone make nasty comments to her? She didn’t have chemo or a hysterectomy, but because she’s famous it’s ok?
Ok, enough about my rant lol. I’m excited for my family to hopefully be growing. It’s a long process, lots of paperwork, lots of patience and lots of money. I guess it’s going to be kinda like Match.com for a uterus!! I just pray my husband will be blessed with a child of our own, or twins if we are even more lucky!( not to be greedy, but been through hell n back I think that’s ok to be lol).
I really don’t know what to expect on this journey. I know there will be ups and downs. And the big one, no guarantee this will work, but we won’t know until we try. Hopefully this time next year I will be writing about what to expect, when your expecting someone else carrying your child 🙂
Of course all of us who have or had cancer have thought about death.
Hearing about Brittany Meynard story of course hits very close to home. Only being 29 and being diagnosed with terminal brain cancer and being given the opportunity to choose the day that she dies, to me makes her one of the strongest people I have ever seen.
Now, some people say that it’s being selfish choosing to take your own life in that manner. People in our position ,and given that there is a choice it’s not being selfish! Its actually being generous to the family and friends that you love. It gives them the opportunity to say goodbye and with dignity.
I feel like the people who are against this just don’t get the pain and suffering that people who have cancer go through. ( and other terminal diseases). And not to mention the financial cost that it brings to the family. For the past four years all I’ve been doing is dealing with surgeries scans, infusions, medications. Also not being able to work and having to be on disability really put you in a financial predicament,even though you do have insurance, the disability does not pay much.
Of course this is brought about the thought of my own mortality. ( not that I have not thought about it several times over the past 3years). But it is alwaysin the back if my mind what if the cancer comes back again, what would I do? What would you do? I mean going to chemo was pure hell, radiation was not much better, the multiple biopsies, the mastectomy tme and now several surgeries following my mastectomy, has all been so trying on myself and my family. So, if some reason I was in her position and I was given that short amount of time knowing how painful this would be, I would do the exact same thing she is doing.
So to you Brittney,I say bravo because you are taking control of this disease, youare choosing when it is your time to go and youhave that right to die in the matter that you see fitting.
Brittany I hope somehow you find comfort in knowing what lies ahead and that your family is excepting of your choice. I hope that all the attention on this brings light to end of life issues. Because unless you have had a deadly disease or have a love one who does, you just don’t understand fully what this is all about.
OK, I have to admit I didn’t like Breaking Bad at first. Yes, boo hiss at me I deserve it. I just thought it was a show about some meth heads… in my defense I didn’t see it from the beginning, so I decided to binge watch it and I LOVED it!
The premise of a dying man with lung cancer doing anything to secure the future of his family,I totally get it. But when you get down to the nitty griddy of it, he could pretty much be any of us. The twisted fact that its a chemistry teacher who has lung cancer and he learns to cook meth is a brilliant!!! Chemistry teacher by day, then by night uses the same knowledge to whip up blue meth to make millions is genius!!!
So this got me thinking what would you do if you had this terminal diagnosis? Would you fight( like many of us have and do)? Give up? Or would you ” break bad” like Walter White??
This is my latest T-shirt added to my sick cancer humor and what I owe the idea for this topic to. Hell, if you can’t laugh at yourself who can you laugh at?
YES I am going to be a pain in the ass about this!!! So I am reposting this important blog.
I am so passionate about ACS and what they do for breast cancer. Sadly I am no where near my goal, but that’s ok! I did just have a mastectomy a few weeks ago so I don’t have my usual ways of fund raising.
If you can find it in your heart and in your wallet to donate ANYTHING it would be greatly appreciated!! As always pass along my information!!
The more money we raise, the more lives we can save!
I hope everyone is feeling a little generous! Please check out my link to my personal American Cancer Society Making Strides to end Breast Cancer fund raising page. I wont be able to walk due to my condition but that wont stop me from exceeding the amount I raised last year!! So if you can find it in you heart(and your pocket lol) and show your support by making a donation. And if you do, I thank you from the bottom of my heart!! And if you are unable to know I appreciate the thought!
Because I know I will make a difference in the fight to end breast cancer. I know that by raising funds and walking in the American
Cancer Society Making Strides Against Breast Cancer event I will help
save lives from breast cancer. Last year I was thrilled to make Pacesetter status by raising over $2600 and that was my first year participating!
I believe that one day breast cancer will never steal another year from anyone’s life like it had done to me. Making Strides is not only my opportunity to join my community to fight back against breast cancer but it is also a way to inspire hope by raising funds and awareness to help those facing
the disease like myself.
WHO I AM MAKING STRIDES FOR
My reason for walking in the Making Strides event is personal – just
like every other walker’s story. As many of you know I was diagnosed
almost three years ago with stage II A breast cancer at age 36 after
being married for only a year. I had a lumpectomy, four rounds of chemo, 33 rounds of radiation ,four more breast biopsy’s, a total hysterectomy and just six weeks ago I had a bilateral mastectomy. All because of Breast cancer!! It has been a very hard and long journey!!!!
We need to find a cure so no more days are taken away from people like myself by this horrible disease!!
I am still waiting on my CBC results and still have a low grade fever. I feel that over the past three years fighting the big C God chose this path for me. Not because I need to have more crap in my life( I meant really who ever wants a monkey wrech thrown into lifes plan). But I was chosen to bear these things, because I am the strongest of the strong. Most people would have crumbled after loosing a parent three months before your wedding. Or having emergency surgery for an ectopic pregnancy three months after being married. Or yet a breast cancer diagnosis a year after being married and being told I now can never carry another child! Or even better, after all the chemotherapy and radiation having three more biopsys and total hysterectomy! And then the icing on the cake, a bilateral mastectomy!
I would not change my life one bit. All of it has shaped myself and my family. It has taught my son be strong when the going gets tough. It has also shown him the gift of giving to others when I do my Strides walk. He is proud of me and my fight ,and in turn I am proud of him for how well, as a child he has taken all this in and made him stop and think about things.