Tag Archives: hope

Update. Let the healing begin..,AGAIN!


  Here I am not able to sleep. Partially because of pain but mostly anxiety. Plus the dog curled up in my lap constantly does not help the hot flashes, but it’s ok I need the snuggling to get me through this. 

 Boomer snuggling with me  Tomorrow I get to see my new breasts!! And maybe have a drain removed ( I hate them they are horribly sore) I really hope this was the last surgery, and believe me this one was a doozie!!! Constant pulling and pressure. 

The first day home was a huge struggle to get the pain meds right. The second day started running a fever, highest it went was 100.9, whew just missed going to Er. I have tendencies to run fevers after all my surgeries. I think it has something to do with my Lupus. Having a fever to go along with everything else was pretty unbareable. But I can see some cleavage!! At least there is cleavage at the end of this tunnel!🚂 

I’m just so uncomfertable with the two drains and not being able to lift my arms. My husband has been a fantastic caregiver as always, I don’t know if I could do it for someone else.

My son has also been a huge help, but you know 15yr olds busy with friends and work. Sadly to say this is “normal” for him lol. I do feel this entire cancer thing has made him a better person. I see a lot of compassion from him and he has a tendency to always help someone in need. ( plus he does his own  wash! Your welcome future wife! Just don’t meet him for like 13-14yrs from now I’m not quite ready to cut the apron strings 😁)

I’ll be back in a few days with an update of how my girls are going

Oh and don’t forget to check out my Etsy store!! http://www.etsy.com/store/ ShoreSerenity , sea glass jewelry, beachy decor , wine cork decor and  wreaths. If u mention my blog “chemobrainandmore”, you will receive 15% off any one item in my shop, good only until September 5th so hurry! One per customer please. 



Setting my goal high for Strides! Time to start saving some lives!!

Setting my goal high for Strides! Time to start saving some lives!!

I’m proud to say I am part of this amazing group of people fund raising to end breast cancer. This is my third year walking for ACS and I am looking forward to many more years of supporting the fight for a cure. My goal this is to raise $2800, surpassing my first walk of $2600. I KNOW I CAN DO THIS! And no one will tell me I can’t, your talking about a two time survivor so I am even more determined!

Please pass along my info by text, reblogg on WordPress, FB, twitter, word of mouth, carrier pigeon lol just anyway to get it out there. If your able to donate even a doller it’s greatly appreciated! If your unable to, just cheering my team on is a huge help! I am also selling several “unique” breast cancer support bracelets for donations( they make me laugh & I figured will make someone else laugh too).Please send me a message if you are interested in a bracelet and so can send you pics of them and arrangements to get it to you.

I just have to say I am just so excited for October! It’s a passion I have!! Now, pink is def not my fav color, but it a color for a great cause! I pray one day I won’t have to fund raise anymore because there will be a cure. Until then, Heathers “New” Rack Pack will be hitting the pavement every year!! I just want to be able to give back to what has been given to me. It’s karma!! And it makes the hell I’ve been through all worth it if I can help just one person!

So who’s ready to start supporting,donating and kick some cancer ass?!?!?

Thanks!!!! Heather aka, The “New” Rack Pack


Team URL: http://main.acsevents.org/goto/Heathersnewrackpack >


Is it really infusion time again?!?! How much can a person take??

Is it really infusion time again?!?! How much can a person take??

Yep, it’s been six months since my last vile infusion of Zometa. I am so horribly anxious about the pain. And yes, the night terrors have stated up. What I’m so anxious about Is this type of bone pain is indescribable. It gives me chills just thinking of how my legs, jaw and pelvis will ache and I won’t sleep or walk 😦 Unfortunately it is a evil necessity!

The positive is, three down seven to go!!!! Ok, not much positivity to go on with this one, but I’ll be happy I won’t have osteoporosis in my 70’s! So I guess BRING IT ON, I’ve been through worse, right?????


Would you be willing to break bad??


OK, I have to admit I didn’t like Breaking Bad at first. Yes, boo hiss at me I deserve it. I just thought it was a show about some meth heads… in my defense I didn’t see it from the beginning, so I decided to binge watch it and I LOVED it!

The premise of a dying man with lung cancer doing anything to secure the future of his family,I totally get it. But when you get down to the nitty griddy of it, he could pretty much be any of us. The twisted fact that its a chemistry teacher who has lung cancer and he  learns to cook meth is a brilliant!!!  Chemistry teacher by day, then by night uses the same knowledge to whip up blue meth to make millions is genius!!!

So this got me thinking what would you do if you had this terminal diagnosis? Would you fight( like many of us have and do)? Give up? Or would you ” break bad” like Walter White??


This is my latest T-shirt added to my sick cancer humor and what I owe the idea for this topic to. Hell, if you can’t laugh at yourself who can you laugh at?

What do nipple tattoos and crabs have in common??


This is an amazing video that was sent to me by one of my friends. This brought tears to my eyes because I see myself in this woman. Everything in this really puts breast reconstruction into prospective for those people who just don’t get the epidemic of us that struggle to be “normal” after having a mastectomy. And I totally get the awkward looks you get when you say you have no nipples, I now tell people for shock value lmao, hell if you can’t laugh at yourself and keep fighting, it makes this journey even longer!

I have a feeling I maybe taking a road trip to Maryland with my girls after my next surgery for crabs and a “Vinny”!!!! Enjoy!!



(This is not a tatt from Vinny , I just thought it was appropriate 🙂

Great things DO come out of the storm!

Great things DO come out of the storm!

This rainbow is the perfect picture to describe the past year… It was rough, and hit me hard and didn’t seem like it would end. At the end of it all a bright miracle in all that darkness! I am finally seeing the light and life after the storm 🙂 God has some amazing miracles!

“and I think to myself, what a wonderful world”

( picture from the Jersey Shore it’s a FULL rainbow! And one end it’s a double rainbow, I know it’s a sign good things are coming!!) 20140524-195629-71789070.jpg


Three weeks post op implant surgery, I got an A+!

Three weeks post op implant surgery, I got an A+!

Last week I got an A+ from my PS Dr. Assad on healing. He really did a beautiful job. He was very happy with how the radiated side is doing. So I had my stitches removed, I didn’t feel a thing! I have purchased silicone strips to cover the incisions to help them heal. I even put them on where the drains where, for some reason they are very red but not infected. So next visit four weeks. I do have to keep a compression bra on and I have a lump we believe is scar tissue that we have been watching since I had the expanders in. I got these great bras called Barely There at my fav store Kohl’s. The form to your body and no wires. They kinda fit like sports bra so very comfy to sleep in and great if you have a low cut blouse and need to cover the cleavage.

Now the not so fun news. Tomorrow I have a MRI of my liver. Yes, it’s that time to check out the supposed hemangioma we discovered in May when I had all my scans for the mastectomy. I hope my favorite tech is there! He gets my IV on the first shot every time! Last time I was able to meditate so well I fell asleep in it! I do hate having them done but thats a part of my life now. I just know eventually I will start glowing!! Now the other thing I’m still in a lot of pain and if I could sleep all day I would. Anyone else have this? I know I have been beat up physically pretty bad (and mentally)for the past three years, I just don’t know if my body has just finally had it and needs to regenerate. I finally decided to talk to a professional because “perky” me is showing major signs of depression. I almost felt bad asking for help because I’m always told how strong I’ve been, but I guess it also takes a strong person to ask for help too!

So now that we are somewhat physically on track it’s time to get my mind on track. I just keep questioning why the first time around I didn’t feel like this. Why this time? It’s weird how trauma hits you at different times in your life.